Friday, December 29, 2006

"Dad, My Socks are Boring!"

Where do they learn this stuff?

The other day, the Helper walked into the living room and the following conversation took place:

The Helper: “My socks are boring!”

Me: “What?”

The Helper: “My socks are BORING! I need my Christmas ones.”

Me: “Okay, give me a minute and I’ll be right there.”

For those of you who do this for a living you understand that being bored, never, ever happens. I am never bored nor have I ever uttered that word. I can say the same for the Mommy as well. Also, I’m positive; Mickey, Bob the Builder and Handy Manny have never said something was “boring.” Okay, now I’m intrigued, I have to get to the bottom of this. I go into his room, but can’t find the aforementioned “Christmas socks,” which were a Christmas gift -- obviously. Mommy must have put them away – in plain sight -- so I can’t find them. I explain he’ll have to wait until Mommy gets home.

The Helper: “But Dad, my socks are boring!”

Me: “Buddy, why are they boring?”

The Helper: (Lifting a foot in the air) “See!”

Me: (Realizing that’s all I’m getting, I respond) “Mommy will fix it when she gets home honey, Okay?”

The Helper: “Okay.”

The Mommy came home and I explained today’s crisis. She went into his room and said, “They’re right here.” The Helper put on his Christmas socks and all was right with the world. Mommy = Hero, Daddy = Incompetent Fashion Guru. Moments later the Helper returns to the living room and is wearing the “boring” socks over the new Christmas ones.

The Mommy: “Honey, why do you have those socks on over your new ones?”

The Helper: (No response – He exits stage right!)

I guess he didn’t want to get the new ones dirty. Who’s he kidding – dirt on MY floors?!? I don’t think so! So now, not only do I have to make sure he’s clean, fed, entertained, educated, and exercised, I have to make sure the daily apparel choices aren’t “boring.” White socks (or gray), jeans (or sweatpants), and a solid color T-Shirt (with some sport or truck design) is the official little boy uniform. I think he needs to read the manual again! As always, thanks for reading!


Oh, The Joys said...

Well, by all means, make sure you let Mom pick out the Man Purse when the time comes.

Karly said...

"Dad=incompetent fashion guru"
Yep...same at our house. (Dad's color blind, though, so he has a built in excuse to never get the kids dressed.)

Long Island Dad said...

No "Euro Clutches" here -- just genuine cowhide toolbelts. Please see picture: